i. you’ve lived past too many terrors, i’m afraid. airtight lungs and terrible things leave you choking. quietly, of course. very quietly. you cannot stand the thought of anyone else knowing that you are disintegrating through the small cracks in your bones.
ii. you were not then, you were not before. you are now. you are here. you exist in an empty plane. and darling, you are so terribly lonely.
iii. listen. do you hear? echoes that beat in your head, rhythmic screams and slight pauses. you take comfort in those brief silences because then, you can close your eyes and hope for sleep. but those echoes, those goddamn echoes. they keep you awake, yet you suffer through the nightmares.
iv. you remember in glimpses: names. objects. places. me.
v. they’ve broken you. took you apart. taped back the pieces and called you brand-new. this is who you are, they said. this is what you did.
vi. but you didn’t do it.
vii. but you didn’t do it.
"— a few things before you go // f.r. (via alleyspat)
